SIGNS THAT AN ABUSER MAY BECOME A LETHAL THREAT
According to Tonya Turner, Senior Staff Attorney at Break the Cycle, in her presentation on Teen Dating Violence during Domestic Violence Awarenessmonth, the following are signs that an abuser may become so extreme as to be a threat to your life.
THREATENS YOUR LIFE - Do not take any threat to your life lightly! If your partner is willing to say it they may be willing to do it. Do not hesitate to tell someone that your partner has made these types of threats.
EXTREME JEALOUSY - Your partner is jealous of any time you spend away from them. Your partner won’t let you hang out with friends or even your family and wants to know where you are every single minute.
STRANGULATION - If your partner has ever put hands on your neck and strangled you until pass out or almost pass out, they are capable of killing you!
STALKING - This includes driving by your house at all hours, calling or texting you excessively, checking out where you work or always “turning up” where you are.
ABUSE OF ALCOHOL OR DRUGS - Anyone under the influence is bad news.
USE OF WEAPONS – A partner who has access to weapons and is comfortable using them can become extremely dangerous.
INCREASE IN VIOLENCE - Your partner has escalated violent episodes from pinching, slapping or grabbing to punching, shoving etc.
RECENT BREAK-UP - You are 75% more likely to be killed in the days or weeks after a break-up.
THREATENS SUICIDE OR HARM TO HIM/HERSELF - Your partner may try to manipulate you by threatening to commit suicide so you’ll stay involved in the relationship.
Recognize the signs of dating abuse and get urgent help if your relationship exhibits any of these characteristics. You don’t have to handle this alone. Sharing can save your life.
If you determine that any of these warning signs are part of your relationship, remember: you are not alone. You may not know how to get help. You may be afraid to leave the situation. Abusers know that they can control you emotionally because no one wants to admit that someone else has treated them so poorly. Do not be ashamed. Dating abuse is not your fault. Recognize the signs of dating abuse and get help if your relationship exhibits any of these characteristics. You don’t have to handle this alone. Sharing can save your life. For confidential help, please call the National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline: 1-866-331-9474. If you are in the UK please see our Here4Help page.
loveisrespect.org, a collaboration of Break the Cycle and the National Teen Dating Abuse Helpline, can now answer your questions and concerns via text message. Simply text “LOVEIS” to 22522 for confidential help. Normal texting fees apply.